Dear Queer ~ My Adult Child Came Out as Transgender

Gayly Giving Advice Straight from the Heart ~ March 2025

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Dear Queer,

My stepkid (19) just came out as trans and is undergoing gender-affirming hormone therapy. I want to trust their process and be an ally, but I fear as a cis straight woman, there is so much I don’t know, cannot know, and I don’t want to ask obnoxious questions. And I am terrified for them in this current political climate. What resources and mindsets do you recommend for people like me who want to ally with our trans (and LGBTQIA+) loved ones?

Thank you!

Grace

Photo by Aiden Craver on Unsplash

Hi Grace,

Thank you so much for writing in. I hear your earnest desire to be led by respect and love as you navigate this tender terrain, and you are definitely not alone in this regard. The most inquiries I’ve received this year have been regarding our trans loved ones, hands down. As one of the first generations in mainstream history to witness our trans family members living openly, the choices we make today are quite literally paving the way for how this time will be remembered by humanity. This is a huge…