DearQueer~ Is Being Gay a Choice?
Gayly Giving Advice Straight from the Heart ~ May 2024
DearQueer,
I am the father of three and my firstborn just told his mother and me he thinks he’s gay. I raised him the way my father raised me, to work hard, love harder, and pray hardest. God has always been #1 in our lives. He is our oldest at 17, with a brother who’s 14 and his sister who’s 13. He had several girlfriends in high school, so this comes as a surprise to all of us. My wife is afraid of losing him. She’s worried I’ll come down too hard on him and drive him away. I think how my father would treat me if I pulled a stunt like this and I’d have seen his fist. My dad was never afraid to keep me in line. I don’t want my father to think I’m weak if I can’t keep my son in line, too. I’ve done some research on the internet and I came across your column. Don’t you think this could be a phase? Is homosexuality a choice?
Thank you,
A Concerned Father
Dear Concerned Father,
I’m so glad you wrote to me. In a family unit, when something major happens to one member, it affects all members. The ripple effect may be smaller in some directions and stronger in others, but an impact all the same. I sense you are swimming amongst the ripples, trying your best not to make larger…
